Life, Love and Syndromes
It's very hard to live each day,
Because no matter what I do or say,
At any moment it can attack.
My body is so out of whack.
I can be going along quite fine,
when all of a sudden I will find,
My syndromes in all their complexity
Will cause pain, hot flashes, or anxiety.
I get so angry at my condition,
It takes away all of my ambition.
Pounds me down into submission.
There's no such thing as remission.
I know that others with this misery,
Live as I do, on the periphery.
We look fine, so other's often dismiss,
Our need for comfort, a hug and kiss.
The chemistry of love, in it's own way,
Could actually keep symptoms away.
So this is just one more reason why,
It is so hard to bid love goodbye.
I was born when science had no idea,
of these things we now call dyslexia,
chronic fatigue, and Fibromyalgia.
No one even had a best guess,
for what doctors now call IBS.
Damn all the years so many had to suffer,
Wherein we were forced to create a buffer,
to protect from things family, doctors said;
Quit complaining, it's all in your head!
I was told I was just lazy and stupid,
so from happiness I felt excluded.
Born when there was so much unknown,
of those things they now call syndromes.
Damn those times when we felt so alone.
BUT when all is said and done,
We might be the only one,
to acknowledge how far we've come.
So come on; say it clear and loud:
"OF MYSELF I AM SO VERY PROUD!"
(art that goes with this poem)
This next poem was a bit harder to write, and I had
some help of a dear friend!
I wanted so much to create a poem about the work I am doing, deep
Out of my Childhood ..
In my childhood I did sow the seeds,
To give myself the best chance to succeed.
Despite my fears I attended my garden,
Preventing my heart from becoming hardened.
From out of the painful lonely years,
Watered heavily with my tears,
Blossoms sprouted among my fears.
To my surprise, they were there all along,
These beautiful flowers, stubbornly strong!
So now I am now beginning to construct,
a sturdy white picket fence to obstruct,
Any threatening weeds seeking to encroach,
Or dangerous pests that do approach.
Only with maturity I learned what they were,
These seeds I planted to confer,
The skills and strengths I now prefer.
To help me develop and mature.
Reality is now the gentlest rain,
helping to wash away my weeds of pain.
Letting my Soul's radiance shine bright,
My Freedom blossoms in the light!
These next ones come from my "Inner Child Dialoging" ~
Because I seem to express my emotions easier through poetry,
I thought to try expressing the interaction between me and my
inner child self (that is my emotional, wounded self) this way.
This is HIGHLY PERSONAL but I am sharing in case it may
illustrate how a dialog can help you get a handle on that "wild
child" emotional storm we sometimes have inside ourselves.
Inner Child Of Mine
an on going dialog poem...
What is the matter, inner child of mine?
I feel so lonely right now, in time!
I understand you feel so sad,
I understand your feeling bad,
Too many times like these you've had!
I know it seems overwhelming too,
But there are pink days as well as blue!
But WHEN? I need to feel better NOW!
Shhh be calm, I will tell you how,
Today we'll do something to sooth your heart,
Would you like to do some brand new art?
Yes, I think something with a kitty!
Sure, we'll do that together and make it pretty!
I bet that when your feeling better, you will find
the world a little brighter, a little more kind.
But I want it NOW! RIGHT NOW, not later!
Yes I hear your impatience, your need to feel better,
But first we both need to do all of our chores,
and then we'll do art, that will be our reward!
I see that little smile tickling at the corners of your mouth,
Here, take my hand, we'll go together, we'll work it out.
I'm here for you, little inner child of mine,
I love you so much, and I am sure we'll be fine!
I know you feel we got the short end of the stick,
But remember us, we never quit!
We climb those hills and mountains high,
And way up here we see beautiful sky!
It stretches so far, there really is no limit!
Like you and I, we made that commitment,
Our life will mean something very special
Together we are changing on a soul level.
I know it's hard, there's no denying,
But I'm so proud we never give up trying!
What's the matter little one?
I am afraid I am coming undone.
of these feelings buried deep,
underneath the anger we keep,
What are those feelings my sweet dear?
Please tell me, I want you to be clear.
I'm afraid we still love that man we lost,
that again we will feel tossed,
Away with no care or thought,
and this will bring back the pain it brought!
Well take my hand and hold it tight,
I know it's scary, especially in the night,
and I know it feels like an endless fight,
But with faith and sheer willpower, we will take flight!
But I don't trust you! We still feel BAD!
I know, but there IS something we've always HAD!
We'll both look up, and we'll be glad!
Our Higher Self is always there
Always invested in our care!