Creations Poetry 32
Copyright Lyne's Creations June 2015, All Rights Reserved
You may NOT take copies of these poems for any reason.
Note: I often come back, re-read and even
edit my poems. They, like me, Men's Sins
I'm Trying Not To Care
are a work in progress. I may change a word here and there or I may add
a whole stanza! Some have art, and some will get illustrated later on.
FYI: The best three FREE websites to help with writing poetry are:
RhymeBrain Thesaurus and How Many Syllables
I use these sites constantly, and the Thesaurus site is the MOST comprehensive one I have every seen!!
A Short Span of Days
(I woke up out of a dream, swung around,
grabbed a note pad, and in the half light, this "poured out"!)
A long time ago and very far away,
I was truly loved for a short span of days.
Then to my shock and dark troubled surprise,
That endless love vanished, nothing but lies.
How could such a love devoted and true,
Just disappear, leave me crumpled and blue?
For an incredibly short span of time,
We were as one, I was his, he was mine.
He showed me how very precious I must be.
Taught me what it is to be loved properly,
But if that were true, then how could he just leave me,
So all alone, dreaming of a love that could be?
Still I will wake from troubled, yet loving dreams,
And wonder what honest love really does mean,
I was cared for and cherished, and then I was not,
I was precious to another, then I was forgot.
One moment in time changed me in a profound way,
Love lingers only in dreams, each night as I lay,
Living my life all alone, as I'm forced to stay,
Now so far away from that sweet short span of days.
(A person I've known for over 30 years,
and many lifetimes before this, asked
something of me that was just unbelievable)
When he spoke,
Made me choke,
And ruined hope.
A shocking scheme,
That was extreme,
Thoughtless and mean,
He can not redeem,
Any of my respect,
I had to be direct,
We had ever been.
After a thousand lives,
We were breaking ties,
Going separate ways,
For the rest of our days.
There was another man,
I long for that one friend,
I wish we could talk again,
He'd understand my pain,
But trouble I'd then gain...
As HIS heart was my home,
So I stay here alone,
With tears deep within,
From these men's sins.
Not Bad for My Age!
(Just meandering through thoughts, noting my day,
how it felt, in rhyme...and when I came to the end of
my poem-thoughts, my Higher Self gave me that last line!!
and I GRINNED IN SURPRISE! ha! heeee!)
It's a rainy, cuddly stay inside Sunday,
It's nice to relax, keeping the cold at bay,
I love the feeling of safe isolation,
As I work on my latest art creation.
The heater hums warmly, drying clean hair,
As I sit comfy, in my computer chair.
And if the noise in my old ears would cease,
I would have complete and utter sweet peace.
Still, even with my numerous health issues,
I don't bemoan my life or reach for tissues,
I just enjoy every day as best as I can,
With the entertainment and skills I have at hand.
Not too bad for an old lady who feels young,
Because I know not all my songs have been sung,
I still have a lot more to do in this lifetime,
And living alone, my successes are ALL MINE!
(looking out the window as soon as
I woke up, the sight I saw inspired:)
The rain drops sparkle from all of the trees,
Colors are radiant as they can possibly be,
Air crisp and cool on the refreshing breeze,
Beauty inspires HOPE for all who care to see.
My heart was broken so badly,
Cracked wide open so very wide,
So while a part of me lives sadly,
My soul now expresses a new side.
Poetry just flows straight out of me,
Inspired both, by laughter and tears,
From the beauty of sights I see,
As well as all my joys and fears.
I did not know what was deep inside,
Now my innermost feelings shine,
From every corner that they reside,
Where they had aged like a fine wine.
These parts of me insist on being heard,
Often teaching me things I need to know,
Of a deeper knowledge, bringing the word,
Helping me to evolve, and really grow.
It seems from a deep sleep, I'm in recovery,
So now I live a life of self discovery,
And every day, I wait to see what I will say,
As on this changing road of life I make my way.
(It seems like life, and some people in it,
are really throwing me a lot of curves,
a lot of crap lately, and I'm fighting
more depression right now.)
I tried to love you for 30 years,
But all that came were many tears,
You hated my friends and my family,
Unable to feel even respect for me.
Always controlling, not letting me be,
Teaching, lecturing, forcing me to see,
The world though your eyes, only your way,
Never giving me a chance or my own say.
Trying to make me a puppet on your strings,
never respecting my own vision of things,
Yelling at me until I would burst into tears,
Only then you would soften and allay my fears.
Finally strong enough to set you apart,
Terrified yet brave in my fragile heart,
Yet through a dark nasty twist of fate,
With bad health, I'm forced to tolerate,
Your help with things I can't ask of a stranger,
Things that would put my finances in danger.
So on and on our unhealthy dance persists,
While I sit wishing for safer relationships.
This situation keeps backing me further to the wall,
Filling me with frustrated thoughts of chucking it all,
Yet deep inside myself, I confer with my soul,
Pleading for help, for ways to gain more control.
But while my Higher Self is there to give assistance,
The actual hard work is mine in this physical existence,
So all I can do is keep fighting, keep working to stay sane,
Hoping all my losses will be outweighed by all that I gain.
I am sitting here, trying so hard not to care,
Trying to focus on my game of solitaire,
Trying not to face the tears in my heart,
That are trying to well up, from his part,
In causing my awful emotional pain,
Because he was hoping for monetary gain.
Emotional blackmail is an awful phrase,
Yet I recognize it from within my shocked haze.
He passively-aggressively tried to manipulate,
Hoping he could take advantage and intimidate,
Threatening withdrawal of his helping hands,
BUT I SAID NO, AND MADE A VERY FIRM STAND!
But this just makes me see that he has now shown,
That this man, professing love, is made of stone,
He expected me to give him a great deal of money,
If I wasn't so shocked, this actually would be funny!
I can not laugh, I just feel sick, and much more alone,
That he could actually threaten my very home!
How he could ask that I give up my home's deed,
To secure his own house for his selfish needs?!
So the truth is that he has used me from the start,
Taking full advantage of my generous heart,
Because of my inexperienced fear of the world,
He had found his perfect patsy in this little girl.
This shallow man is really so very narcissistic,
I now see he has no redeeming characteristics!
I'm finally getting angry at his audacity,
While reminding myself of my very great capacity,
To be independent, and take care of myself,
No matter my situation, no matter my health.
My loving powerful Higher Power cares for me,
This is a fact I can cling to every day, constantly.
So I pull myself up by my bootstraps every day,
And mustering my inner strength, courageously say,
I must keep trusting this part of me that is so strong,
Making independence and creativity my song!
For mere seconds in what we know as time,
I'd thought that a sweet loving life was mine,
But those moments just vanished before my eyes,
Like a magician's trick, or a lover's lies.
Fearful illness after a heart badly broken,
Agonies that rent my soul, tore me wide open,
Life's events came together to conspire,
Forcing me to change, as though forged in a fire!
Now, although every day is full of all sorts of pain,
I can be proud of every single step I have gained.
The reality of this comes through in my dreams,
Where hard won achievements are recurring themes.
Still while mere seconds of this life were a real success,
Sadly I'd like to forget about all of the rest,
So the truth is, if I should die while I'm asleep,
It's only my accomplishments that I will keep.
in the url address to the next higher one, and hit enter to go to that page faster!
I have so many pages, it's getting crazy for my dyslexic mind to keep adding
individual links to each page thereafter.
I'm Trying Not To Care